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She looked over my designer jeans, my purple sweater that looked like it belonged in a magazine for Macy’s and my Rolex watch that Hawk had gotten me for Christmas. ‘Boy don’t you look snazzy. You have really come up in the world from the girl who showed up on my doorstep with tears in her eyes.’ I didn’t want to remember that day. My life was so much better now. I had a man who loved me, a son who thought the world of me and my family back. I didn’t need Sheila or her drugs anymore. ‘Yea well I grew up.’ I sneered at her. ‘Maybe you should.’ She looked at me affronted all of a sudden. I never saw her hand come up until it slapped me across the face. In retaliation I slapped her back. Then she grabbed my hair and we started wrestling around on the frozen ground. She tried to scratch me, I tried to rip her eyes out. When she bit my hand I backhanded her. I don’t know how much time past as we wrestled there on the icy ground in front of the mall. All I knew was that I wanted to pay. When one man drove me down, I liked, wanted and maybe even needed to learn that I could still get the thrill of being wanted by a man. Not just any man, because any girl can go out and get the attention of some random stranger in some meet market like an arcade or a bar or even a campus library. But I needed to know that I was desired by a man I respected. That pretty much excluded every man except Charlie. The only thing missing was a way to buy acceptance when I went too far. That's what this whole Saturday Afternoon Delight was about."So here's what I propose. I will buy in advance an opportunity to toy with your affections in the future. That way you can feel comfortable with me and if I get dumped by some guy, I can come to you for comfort, talk with you about it, get the support you've provided me in the past and if I cross the line, you can call me on that and the obligation that I've bought in advance, to tolerate one failure from me, will be covered." So then we would be back.
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